Hi everyone,

Happy holidays!

I have a question. I have two chi puppies, DeeDee and Dexter. They are seventeen weeks old and siblings...brother and sister from the same litter.

DeeDee, my female, is very social. She comes when called, rushes to jump into a lap..she is very people oriented.

Dexter, my male, seems more reserved. He is very friendly, but he will not come when called, he runs if I try to pick him up, he never jumps into a lap, etc. he keeps his distance, although he wags his tail and never ever acts aggressively towards anyone.

DeeDee is definitely dominant. If someone picks Dexter up, she goes nuts and if she can get to him she attacks him.

I've just started obedience training with them and we have determined the need to take the classes separately. Dexter cannot seem to focus on the instruction because he is focused on DeeDee.

Could Dexters reluctance to interact be just his personality or could it be that he is being bullied into staying away by DeeDee? When I spend time with Dexter one on one he seems much more relaxed and willing to cuddle.

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I know they love one another and love us too but I'm worried DeeDee may be intimidating dexter when it comes to him spending time with us.

Ask the instructor about this problem. If Dexter is actually being 'attacked' by DeeDee, then yes he is being bullied.

I did and he suggested it could be a bullying issue. Dexter has a few scars on his neck where she has nipped him pretty good. I'm wondering if I should start crating them separately. It's hard bc they love to cuddle.


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Is sounds like she is very dominant and aggressive with him. They should NEVER be left unsupervised alone. Ever. If its bad enough where he has scars, they need to be kept separated. Dexter is probably very scared of deedee.


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I'm suprised the breeder sold you two puppies from the same litter, most are against this as it very often leads to bullying and fighting especially between same sexes.

If you do a google about "Littermate Syndrome" you'll find some articles that may interest you, quite possibly what is going on here.

Do you do individual training with them? walking them out on their own, training w/o the other in the room etc?

The breeder didn't think their would be an issue because I was taking a male and a female. I've read alot about litter mate syndrome since we got the puppies and I'm concerned of course. They do sleep together but we train, walk, and spend time with them separately as much as possible. I'm hoping that we can overcome the issue. We love them both so much. DeeDee has no trouble separating from dexter but dexter cries if he is left alone without one of us around or without his sister.

There are several here who have litter mates. Successfully.

Therese's Jerry and Tabitha and Codi's Izzie and Bella come immediately to mind.

As with everything, there are horrible stories and success stories. For example, my three all being girls should not all get along and since they are all female they should prefer my husband, which they do not.

My oldest two came to us just 8 weeks apart and they are just 18 days apart in age. Hope was much more energetic than Ruby and we worried about her in the beginning. As it turned out two 2 years later, Ruby is definitely more bossy.

I think any time there are multiples, there will need to be additional training but it is workable. As much as mine love each other, just like with human kids, I do find myself saying "Manners", "Pleasant" and "Be nice" OFTEN!

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what does the trainer say? perhaps tackle it as you would with a dog with separation axienty? build his confidence etc? lots of positive reinforcement.

& with DeeDee try and prevent the behavior especially when you say she goes to attack dexter when you pick him up? sounds like she's trying to control the entire situation she should be respecting your actions as well!
Though I'm sure you've tried these things, best have a trainer you trust come in and assess the situation really if it gets too severe.

I know with my puppy he is alot more nervous than his brother and sort of sounds like your dex, his brother on the otherhand is so bold its reckless haha, constantly flying off high places, totally dope, falls asleep in peoples arms tummy side up, bossing other dogs around, runs straight into your lap by call etc.

Where as mine is more reserved and would happily sit back and watch things, doesn't like being fussed too much by strangers or picked up unless ofc it benefits him ( up to a bed/down stairs lol) and generally more wary of heights and strange people/dogs.

I also used to go to puppy classes with his brother but couldn't get noah focused on me at all as he was just obsessed with playing with his brother, but I wasn't allowed treats or anything to draw his attention back to me, he is a foodie and praise/toys don't do nothing in that sort of high distraction enviroment for him, anyway was an awful trainer and me and noah go somewhere else now and do very well,but try and find something VERY high reward for dex to take his mind of dee? so he'll focus on you etc, Be that his fave toy or a smelly delicious treat.