I probably shouldn't have posted this :-/

I'm so sorry you are feeling like this.Have you got family,brothers,sisters that you could talk to? Maybe your doctor
could you find something that isn t getting you down so much,like working with animals

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Hi michele, I do have a family but my brother is also depressed and if I talked to him I would make him even more sad. My other sister has moved, and my other sister would not understand. I feel like I've caused a lot of problems for my parents in the past. I was sick a lot and I know it hurt them to see me depressed. My Mom is anxious and depressed as well sometimes and I don't want to throw her off balance either. My dad is like my sister and does not understand. He is a very supportive Dad but I think he wouldn't know what to tell me. My boyfriend helps me out a lot. I can tell him anything but sometimes I just get tired of telling him over and over, you know? Like if I'm going to annoy him.

I don't have a doctor anymore. I will be seeking out some form of treatment soon. I would like to work with animals but...I don't know. I think I would be in the same boat. I would hate hearing about animals being put to sleep at a shelter knowing that I didn't take any of them home with me. Sometimes I wish I could just not care about anything at all, but then again I am glad that I do care. It's a weird feeling.

you sound like a very caring person,you must start thinking about yourself as well,try and get out there and find something that would help you be happy and that you enjoy doing.

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Amaris, when you say "depressed" what do you mean exactly?
Are you sad once in a while, often, or every day?
Is it to the point where you no longer enjoy anything?
Do you find it debilitating?
Are there days you can not get out of bed or eat?
Do you feel insecure? Ugly? Stupid? Useless?
Do you have suicidal thoughts, feelings?
Have you ever tried to hurt yourself?

I ask you these questions because I am quite familiar with severe depression,
I have had it since I was about 12 years old, I am now 27. I actually studied
Psychology in college for 3 years in hope to better understand myself, and
help heal myself, because all over methods failed. I am more than willing to
talk if you want a shoulder to lean on. I am still living with depression, but I'm
dealing much better, day by day. I have a serious bladder illness which makes
thinking positive a challenge, my insane OCD does not help my situation
either. Yet I find a way to work from home, have a hubby, rescue dogs and
cats, be there for my brother, mother and neighbors. There is a way to live with
it...and most times there is a way to completely heal it. You are not doomed,
there is plenty of hope. I'm here if you want to chat, I will not judge.

Take care!

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Thank you Michele and LS for talking to me.

Yes LS, I feel sometimes like I just wouldn't care if someone gave me a billion dollars. When someone asks me what I want to do, I wouldn't care if they'd take me on a trip to Germany, none of it matters. During the past few months I've been sad everyday pretty much. For months it gets better, and then it gets worse. Particularly in the Fall/Winter. I think I might have SAD but I'm not sure. I find myself skipping a lot of meals lately (which is strange because I usually eat so much). I did try to hurt myself but that was years ago. I wouldn't do it again because it caused too much pain to too many people and I realized it was stupid of me. I do feel ugly and insecure a lot. I annoy the heck out of people. For instance, my boyfriend will want to take me to the movies but I will refuse because I feel too ugly and I don't want to be seen. Other days I feel fine :-/

I just get really emotional over a lot of things too. I'm studying Psychology too! I'm in college right now. Well, I'm trying to go but I'm going to have to pretty much repeat this entire semester because I didn't go to class because I couldn't get out of bed. And that just makes me even sadder. Thank you both for talking to me. You're a strong person to be there for so many people and animals. I can barely take care of myself let alone other people who feel bad. The strange thing is, if an animal is in need I forget all about the way I feel and rush in and try to help.

Hey LS, I'm 25 and I suffer from OCD too. "Pure O" in my case but still rather debilitating at times.

I missed your original post, PrincessCupcake, and respect your decision to remove it if you'd rather not talk about it. But know that you aren't alone... I felt depressed for years before finding out that my anxiety was caused by an underlying condition (OCD) so none of the usual treatments did much. One thing I will recommend; is if you are leaning toward medications, try 5-HTP first. It converts to serotonin in your brain; which can help with mood; but just like SSI's can have some side effects. For me it did help; and I didn't have any ill effects from it except that, oddly enough; right after I began taking it, my depression/anxiety would get worse for a day or so prior to getting better. You'll find a lot of mixed reviews on it but I do recommend doing your own research as it could help quite a bit, seems to vary by person. I know I reached a point where I was willing to try anything so I gave it a shot. Now I just pretty much swear by the teachings of Dr. Phillipson (LS that may be familiar to you!) and am using various behavioral techniques that SO FAR have helped reduce (or at least, helped me cope with much better) the spikes.

ETA: What you said about animals in need and rushing to help is SO like me too!!! I can be having the worst day in the world but if I find out about an animal that I have a chance to do something for, it's like I find the strength to push everything else aside and go for it. I think that's probably why I have 5 dogs, LMAO... they give me a reason to get outta bed in the morning. They need me to take care of them and no matter how crappy I feel I can never bring myself to deny them that. <3

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http://www.facebook.com/rescutopia

I used to be very depressed, and then I gave my life over to God and the depression has gone away. God Loves you and wants you to call for Him. This is my belief. I will Pray for you.

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In His Service
Theresa
and Amberleah Lou Lou

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