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  #25  
Old 01-04-2013, 02:18 AM
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Thank you all so very much. Sharing my experience here has helped to lift a weight I feel like I've been carrying since it happened. I did attempt to join a trying to conceive forum the women there were very nice an supportive but they are very much in to tracking their cycles and I know for my own mental well being I can't let myself get to engulfed in every little thing my body may do. I had a problem obsessing with trying to get back what I lost right after it happened an it was not healthy, every month that I didn't conceive I would become very depressed and have a feeling of failure.
All the hugs are amazing and mean so much to me
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  #26  
Old 01-04-2013, 05:54 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Blazer View Post
Thank you all so very much. Sharing my experience here has helped to lift a weight I feel like I've been carrying since it happened. I did attempt to join a trying to conceive forum the women there were very nice an supportive but they are very much in to tracking their cycles and I know for my own mental well being I can't let myself get to engulfed in every little thing my body may do. I had a problem obsessing with trying to get back what I lost right after it happened an it was not healthy, every month that I didn't conceive I would become very depressed and have a feeling of failure.
All the hugs are amazing and mean so much to me
A lot of those boards are over the top, I know what you mean exactly.
I usually never share personal details on this board anymore but because I fully relate to what you're going through on a level only you can understand, we too just lost a baby in early December and it was really awful, I'm always amazed at how insensitive people can be about pregnancy loss as well! they just don't get it. It was a very bad time of year on top of the usual sadness.

If you wish to PM me I'm more than happy to talk to you. (((HUGS)))
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  #27  
Old 01-04-2013, 06:17 AM
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Oh my goodness, how devastating. I am so very sorry for your incredible loss. I, too, am thinking of you and feel the depth of you pain. Huge hugs to you. Best wishes for a bright future.
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  #28  
Old 01-04-2013, 06:41 AM
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I don't know you but I'm very sorry for your sad loss. I can't imagine how devastating that must be. I just wanted to say don't give up hope, my daughter was told she would almost likely never have children. She has PCOS and her husband has an almost non-existent sperm count/deformed/immobile sperm. She did everything to optimise her chances, took vitamins, changed her diet etc. I also gave her my little tip, this worked for me the month I was trying. Sorry about this if its too much information! After you've "done the deed" don't get straight up, elevate your lower half (I put my backside on a pillow and my legs up the wall!). Stay like that as long as possible. It's a natural instinct to get up straight away. Do this every time if possible, preferably for a couple of hours. Anyway, my daughter now has a 16 month old son. I'm sure you're time will come. I know how upset she got every month, when her period was due she would go into the bathroom every five minutes to check and she would be so devastated if it came. At one point she was having 60-85 day cycles but did manage to get it down to 30 with change of diet/weight loss etc. I am thinking of you, please keep us posted even if you just want to jump on here and tell us how awful you feel. Good luck!


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  #29  
Old 01-04-2013, 06:42 AM
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Hugs to you too KittyD


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  #30  
Old 01-04-2013, 07:05 AM
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Oh and I forgot to say, my daughter conceived the month she "relaxed". She had mentally moved on to the next stage, thinking about perhaps adoption or IVF and had stopped manically trying, counting days, taking her temperature etc. They decided to go away just for the weekend and that's when it happened. I know it's easy for me to say "relax", I've never had to try very hard and I've never suffered your loss, I know it becomes all-encompassing and takes over your life even when you tell yourself you won't let it. Watching my daughter go through that was awful, you feel so powerless to help. Try and give yourself another project to concentrate on mentally, perhaps plan a little break somewhere nice even if its for only a weekend if you can't afford a holiday. I'm going to shut up now! X


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  #31  
Old 01-04-2013, 07:37 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KittyD View Post
A lot of those boards are over the top, I know what you mean exactly.
(((HUGS)))
This is the last thing I'm going to say, honestly! Keep off those boards, a lot of them are full of horror stories, my daughter got pretty addicted to them but they didn't do her any good, they either upset her or made her more obsessed. I think she used to go on them and read the horror stories almost to "punish" herself. Xxx


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  #32  
Old 01-04-2013, 08:43 AM
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This is so sad to hear and I'm so sorry for your loss. Draw those that you love near to you, treasure the good things in life and eventually it will happen again for you.

I decided to post to offer some assurance. My sister in law, who is your age, was actively trying for two years to get pregnant and it just wouldn't seem to happen. Eventually it did and the baby stopped growing at 5 weeks - they found this out at the 12 week scan. Our whole family was absolutely devastated. Again, my best friend, who was not actively trying (coincidentally at the same time) went through the exact same thing. After going through this with both of them I do believe that sometimes your body needs a 'trial run'. Not for everyone, but sometimes our bodies work in strange ways.

What I can offer you, as hope, is that my best friend re-conceived two months later and now has a 5 month old beautiful boy. My sister in law re-conceived 7 months later and is now due any day now.

I hope that this helps you see light at the end of the tunnel. Sending you lots of love and chi cuddles xx
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