As everyone probably knows I have owned a Chihuahua before Ember. Well, his name was Max...

We had rescued Max from an abusive family, and in the years he was with me we had bonded strongly. Nothing could have torn us apart. His love for me was unspeakable, and vice versa. So we decided to bring a new dog into the family because his big friend, an 8 year old Beagle (who had sadly gotten heartworm and died suddenly, before we even knew it) had passed on. So we got another beagle friend in early December 2010...

On December 20th, 2010, at roughly 3:55 pm eastern time, I was in the front yard walking Trigger our new beagle, and Max was out in the backyard playing (fenced in) while I did so. Our neighbors' pit bull, Lala, charged up to the fence... and I turned around to go back in, since Lala scared me (the owners of her trained their dogs to fight, mom had reported them several times but to no avail) alot... I heard a high pitched painful "YIP!" behind me. I whirl around only to see Lala over our fence, with my beloved Max in her mouth, shaking him. I stared, frozen and unsure of what to do, in shock. "Goodbye, Max..." is all I could say gently, then he died. I began to scream, mom raced out and saw- she raced over to the neighbors while Grandpa called animal control. Max died December 20th, 2010 at 4:00pm eastern. The day I will never forget.

Animal control came and got the dog that killed him and it got put down on Christmas eve. They took Max's body to a dog cemetary that we don't know the location of.

It's nearly 1 year without Max and I'm barely pulling through. He was the best friend I'd ever had- and I just can't let him go.

I am so sorry. It's so traumatic to see a beloved pet killed before your eyes. It will get better. You will morn, but have to eventually let him go, hard as it is. He's waiting for you at the bridge, he wouldn't want you to be so unhappy. He would want you to go on with your life and celebrate the love you two had, not be sad over it.

__________________

Thank you Jan for the wonderful siggy!

Yes, I know he would want me to move on and not live in the past...
Not that long ago, about a month ago, I was outside in the autumn air sitting on the patio, where I always sat beside him and just petted him telling him all my troubles and what was on my mind, he had always listened. Anyway, I suddenly felt something touch me, almost like fur, and I could... I turned around and I literally SAW Max for about two seconds, then he just faded. I suddenly got totally calm, and it felt like Max was there right beside me...

I still wonder, was that Max or was that me seeing things?

That was probably Max saying goodbye and letting you know you can move on. That he's in a happy place. Poor little fella had such a hard life.

__________________


[url=http://www.TickerFactory.com/]

Yes, I believe that too. I had gave him the best life possible and now he is in a happy place as a reward for giving me the best life possible with him in return.
I love you, Max, play happy at the bridge!

Picture of Max I dug up...

Attached Images

Max 2009.jpg (71.2 KB, 36 views)

Ohhh, that's just so sad.. I cried while reading your post. I can't imagine losing my Teddy. I'm the same way-- whenever I'm sad or conflicted, I like to hold him close and talk to him. Sometimes dogs make the best listeners because they do it free from any judgment or preconceptions.

I'm so sorry for your loss. I know I'd be torn up too, perhaps for years afterwards, if I lost Teddy. But Pam is right. Max would want you to move on and be happy. The situation was nearly unavoidable. No one could have known that that other dog would attack him right then and there. Maybe Max appeared to you to let you know that you should have no guilt and that he's made it safe across the bridge.

He was just beautiful. Again, I'm so sorry.

__________________


Thanks to Jan for my siggy!

I am so sorry. I lost my heart dog Roxy right in front of me in a simular situation as well is is horrible. It's been over 3 years and I still can hear and see it like it was yesterday. I miss her so much. I am sure that was your wee Max stopping by to let you know he is OK. The time you had with was a wonderful thing you did for him. (((((HUGS)))))

__________________


Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lifes whole