When I was 3 years old, my family got our first dog. An American Black Labrador named Coal. We grew up together. He was everything you could ask for in a dog, and a best friend. Whenever I was upset I'd go straight to him and he'd sit there and let me cry on his shoulder and lick my tears away. He was a velcro dog, he'd never leave my side. He was the greatest dog ever. Like a brother to me really. He passed away November 30th 2009 in his sleep. He was nearing the 14 year mark.
And when I was 10 I began begging for my very own dog. And after researching a lot of breeds I chose a Chihuahua. I didn't even have a reason why I wanted one, I just knew. So then on February 28th 2003, I was blessed with Coconut, "Coco" for short, as an early birthday present. A male Chihuahua. My world was centered around him. We had such a huge bond, people were amazed by it. We went and did everything together. Him and Coal were my best friends. And they loved each other so much. Coco was the smartest dog I've ever come in contact with. He could do it all. He was my baby and I seriously would have easily died for him.
It's hard talking about this, and even harder since no one understands the feeling. But I figure since you all are loving chihuahua mothers/fathers it'll be easier to vent.
One morning in my sophomore year of high school I woke up and Coco wasn't feeling well. He had a tummy ache and it kept maing weird noises. I was crying, like I always did when he was sick, begging my rents to let me stay home with him, but of course they said no. "Schools more important" and whatnot. Whatever. Anyway. I got him to drink water, layed him down in my bed, and turned on some classical music for him. I gave him a kiss and said "see you later baby" like I did every morning before I left. I was worried all day and couldn't wait to get home to him.
When I finally made it home, I ran inside and yelled for him. And unlike every other day, he didn't come to me. I kept calling and looked all over the house. My older siblings said they haven't seen him. He wasn't anywhere in the house. So I searched everywhere outside. All around the neighborhood. And behind my neighbors houses where Coco had ran off to before. My siblings left for work so they didn't help. But thankfully I had a good friend with me keeping me steady. I was looking near a busy road when a guy who lived behind my neighbor said hed seen my dog up the road. So we jumped in his truck and he took us to him. He "forgot" to mention the detail where my baby was laying lifeless in the road. People passing him like he was nothing. The vision of him there still haunts me. As it is now as I'm typing this. I had the guy stop in the nearest turn off and I got out and ran to my baby, hoping he wasn't gone yet. I sped in front of a nearing car and got him. He was gone.
As it turns out, my brother let Coco out and forgot about him. We had him trained to stay in our yard because we have no fence. But we were still supposed to watch him. And unfortunately my brother was too lazy and uncaring to do so, and I haven't and never will forgive him for it.
Half of me was taken away on September 24, 2008.
I can't even describe the pain it brings me. It's a physical pain, not just emotional. My heart literally aches. Not a day goes by that I don't think about my boys. They were my everything and more. Despite how much I love Tanner and Bailey, I would do ANYTHING to be with Coal and Coco again.
They say tragic events are supposed to make you stronger. But it's only made me broken and terrified. These scars will never heal. And I don't believe "everything happens for a reason."
Rest in peace boys.
I love you and miss you so much. <|3
Thanks all who read this. Means a lot to me.
&+Tanner just licked all my tears away. He keeps me sane lol.