He may be following you around because he knows that you are upset and he is trying to make peace. He may be desperately attempting all the things that work with your wife and doesn't understand why he isn't making you happy.
You know, even dog people have different ideas of what's acceptable. I am a very physical, huggy person and I like my dogs all over me. I have a friend who doesn't like her dog in her lap but thinks nothing of letting the dog lick her plate, which I think is gross. I let my dogs kiss my face. My husband doesn't like them to kiss his face. When they try, he tells them no, eases them down into his lap, and then pets them and tells them they are good dogs. Our late German Shepherd (RIP Tesla) knew that it was okay to jump on my husband but not me so she would politely sit in front of me to be petted. They are capable of learning boundaries. Gentle consistency has always worked for us. An ex-pen or baby gate when your wife leaves is perfectly acceptable to me as long as he doesn't spend all his time there.
You are right, though. You have to figure this out because not only will he be in your life for a long while, if you wife is a dog person, he is not going to be the only dog in your life. Figure out what your boundaries are and don't feel guilty about it. Enforce those gently with the dog and your wife. Their feelings matter but so do yours! You can work this out - it can be done.
You know, even dog people have different ideas of what's acceptable. I am a very physical, huggy person and I like my dogs all over me. I have a friend who doesn't like her dog in her lap but thinks nothing of letting the dog lick her plate, which I think is gross. I let my dogs kiss my face. My husband doesn't like them to kiss his face. When they try, he tells them no, eases them down into his lap, and then pets them and tells them they are good dogs. Our late German Shepherd (RIP Tesla) knew that it was okay to jump on my husband but not me so she would politely sit in front of me to be petted. They are capable of learning boundaries. Gentle consistency has always worked for us. An ex-pen or baby gate when your wife leaves is perfectly acceptable to me as long as he doesn't spend all his time there.
You are right, though. You have to figure this out because not only will he be in your life for a long while, if you wife is a dog person, he is not going to be the only dog in your life. Figure out what your boundaries are and don't feel guilty about it. Enforce those gently with the dog and your wife. Their feelings matter but so do yours! You can work this out - it can be done.
