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Discussion Starter #1
Have to vent somewhere. Grrrrr. As I may have mentioned somewhere on here 300 years ago I lost 7 stone with a well known diet club about 4 years ago. Took me 18 months. Never been so happy in my life. Was permenantly hungry and frozen but happy. I was 16 1/2 stone and a size 26 and had been for a good 15-20 years. Got down to 9 st 4 and a size 10.
Anywho.....no one told me how to keep it off once I got there. Ive gradually put 4 stone back on over the 4 years like a twit. Back up to 13 1/2 stone.
On Wednesday I went into a jewellers to look for an anniversary present and hubby decided to buy me a lovely bracelet at the same time (result! ha).
The sales lady is giving it all the usual sales crap, is this a gift for you blah blah blah then out of the blue says "so is this for when the little one comes?" I thought Id heard her wrong so i said pardon? "For when the baby comes?" I was so shocked I just said "no Im not". Queue ground open up and swallow me. To make it even better she then says, "Oh, dont worry, if anyone says that to me I just say Im fat". Thanks love.
I have never felt so embarrassed or stupid and downright awful in my life. 2 other people were standing listening. She then made a huge fuss of trying to get the bracelet on me while I was standing there like a giant plum trying not to cry.
This isnt the first time Ive had this but this time it was a shock because I didnt think I was that big and thought I was good at disguising it. Why do people feel when someone is overweight they have the right to comment? You wouldnt go up to a person and say blimey youre skinny/ugly/got a big nose etc. Makes my blood boil. I have been trying my best and have lost 5lbs so far this month. sorry to whinge but my husband cant understand why Im so upset. Still cross 2 days later! lol

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Husbands wouldn't understand,i think it's a woman thing.I would love to put on weight ,what ever i do i never got beyond 7 and a half stone,and i've had people saying you look so thin are you ok ? my daughter takes after me and when she was at school they asked if she was anorexic ?? so you can't win.It's what's inside a person ,not how fat/thin they are.
 

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As i've got older,i don't care anymore.People should think before they open their mouths but as you say people are very strange.If you're happy that's what counts,not what others think
 

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I know the feeling all too well. :( I thought this was just an American thing. I've gotten down to my goal weight, but have put it back on as well. It is always the same ones making comments about "you've put on weight" and/or "wow are you sick or something? Getting pretty skinny there." :confused: I think these people are just looking to make themselves feel good by trying to knock someone else down.

I have never in my life asked anyone if they were pregnant based on their looks. Besides just putting on weight, what if that person just miscarried or has a tumor (both of which I have seen)? We have the whole Freedom of Speech thing here, but that doesn't absolve you of being an idiot, a jerk, insensitive, or just plain stupid.
 

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Don't feel bad for her rudeness! Just have faith in yourself and keep doing what your doing to get healthier. And oh, don't believe for 1 second that people aren't rude like this towards skinny people. I'm 5' 3" 112 lbs and 31 yrs old. I had the flu a couple weeks ago and I dropped down to 107 (rarely ever get sick). Now anyone who has had the flu knows when you are that sick, constantly puking, dehydrated not eating solid foods etc, that you are GOING to lose weight. And yet people still make their comments. Believe in yourself and be secure with who you are. And most importantly don't change, unless it something that you want for yourself and for the benefit of a healthier life 😊


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I would have walked out. There is not way I would have given that woman any commission!

I too have heard comments, my whole life. I use to be able to eat anything and not gain a pound, so I'd get the "Why don't you eat something??" and when I hit my mid 20s I started slowly gaining, to where I'm now 35-40lbs over where I was in high school. Now everyone is concerned about my health b/c I've put on! Everyone has to make a comment - even my grandmother.

I try not to let it bother me. I'm living my life for me, not for everyone else. I'm working out to lose weight and gain muscle FOR ME :foxes15: No one else really matters. Neither does there opinion.

But yeah, TOTALLY would have left that lady hanging! What an idiot.
 

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I'm sorry you went through this, some people are so rude. It sounds like you put a lot of work into losing weight before so it must be upsetting enough to feel like you've taken a step back, let alone having this woman point it out to you in such an insensitive way. Try not let it bother you, this woman clearly has issues if she feels the need to treat people this way (especially customers who come into her store!).

Like others said, people do feel free to comment negatively on skinny people too though (and any other kind of things for that matter... people always find something worth criticising!). I have coeliac disease, but wasn't diagnosed until I was 26 and as a result I was very underweight before. I've had tons of people call me anorexic and say ridiculous things to me. Some of my nicknames in school were bag of bones and skeleton. LOL My previous boss actually bullied me (and a few other women at work) because she hates all skinny women (she even told us all thin women are dumb so she treated us as inferior).
 

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I'm sorry you went through this, some people are so rude. It sounds like you put a lot of work into losing weight before so it must be upsetting enough to feel like you've taken a step back, let alone having this woman point it out to you in such an insensitive way. Try not let it bother you, this woman clearly has issues if she feels the need to treat people this way (especially customers who come into her store!).



Like others said, people do feel free to comment negatively on skinny people too though (and any other kind of things for that matter... people always find something worth criticising!). I have coeliac disease, but wasn't diagnosed until I was 26 and as a result I was very underweight before. I've had tons of people call me anorexic and say ridiculous things to me. Some of my nicknames in school were bag of bones and skeleton. LOL My previous boss actually bullied me (and a few other women at work) because she hates all skinny women (she even told us all thin women are dumb so she treated us as inferior).

Glad you don't work for that person anymore. You would think that women wouldn't be like that towards other women. It sounds like she was jealous and insecure of herself. I was called some of the same names in school! Lol. Mostly by girls too! I had a really tough upbringing, and I've never had much luck with keeping girlfriends around. We are too opinionated lol. Need to be more like guys and not sweat the small stuff lol


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I find that if treated that way.... I can say "are you this Rude to everyone, or is this my lucky day"...... makes them think and realize just how inconsiderate they are....

my motto.... "Noone can take advantage of you, unless you LET them" ... and that includes talking rude to me

forget them... they aren't worth your time...and for whats it worth, I would have dropped that bracelet/necklace/whatever and had my words... and left the store...


BTW, I am on Jenny Craig... and have not told anyone other than my son & family.... just don't want the comments from everyone...


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Discussion Starter #11
I would have walked out. There is not way I would have given that woman any commission!

I too have heard comments, my whole life. I use to be able to eat anything and not gain a pound, so I'd get the "Why don't you eat something??" and when I hit my mid 20s I started slowly gaining, to where I'm now 35-40lbs over where I was in high school. Now everyone is concerned about my health b/c I've put on! Everyone has to make a comment - even my grandmother.

I try not to let it bother me. I'm living my life for me, not for everyone else. I'm working out to lose weight and gain muscle FOR ME :foxes15: No one else really matters. Neither does there opinion.

But yeah, TOTALLY would have left that lady hanging! What an idiot.
Yeah.... and then she has the nerve to ask me to go online and leave her good feedback!

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I'm sorry you went through this, some people are so rude. It sounds like you put a lot of work into losing weight before so it must be upsetting enough to feel like you've taken a step back, let alone having this woman point it out to you in such an insensitive way. Try not let it bother you, this woman clearly has issues if she feels the need to treat people this way (especially customers who come into her store!).

Like others said, people do feel free to comment negatively on skinny people too though (and any other kind of things for that matter... people always find something worth criticising!). I have coeliac disease, but wasn't diagnosed until I was 26 and as a result I was very underweight before. I've had tons of people call me anorexic and say ridiculous things to me. Some of my nicknames in school were bag of bones and skeleton. LOL My previous boss actually bullied me (and a few other women at work) because she hates all skinny women (she even told us all thin women are dumb so she treated us as inferior).
Would you believe she was the manager as well?
Sounds like youve had a tough time and Im sorry for that. I would never ever dream of ever saying anything to anyone about their appearance. Even when I was a child I knew it was wrong and hurtfull. Why do some people just not have that part of the brain that says keep your trap shut?
The other day one of the ladies I clean for asked if I wanted to borrow her Dawn French biography then followed that up with " lm only asking you if youd like to read it, Im not lending it to you because youre fat or anything". Why couldnt she just say "would you like to borrow this book?". I was going into the local shop abd said to a guy in the way "excuse me please, can I just squeeze through?". He turns round and says, "I shouldnt think you could squeeze through anywhere". Tbat was a total stranger. Why? Im quite an inofensive person. I dont understand it. I can never think of anything to say back quick enough, on that occasion I just went home and cried. Another time another lady I cleaned for asked me what xi was doing for the rest of the day. I told her I was going into town to have lunch with my husband. She actually said to me...." I do hope you are going to sit down and eat properly and not walk around eating like those other fat disgusting people". Again, what does Ruth do? Went home and cried, never said a word.

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I find that if treated that way.... I can say "are you this Rude to everyone, or is this my lucky day"...... makes them think and realize just how inconsiderate they are....

my motto.... "Noone can take advantage of you, unless you LET them" ... and that includes talking rude to me

forget them... they aren't worth your time...and for whats it worth, I would have dropped that bracelet/necklace/whatever and had my words... and left the store...


BTW, I am on Jenny Craig... and have not told anyone other than my son & family.... just don't want the comments from everyone...


.
Well done to you for the Jenny Craig. Good luck. DONT tell anyone. As soon as people know the sabotaging you and negative remarks start.

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Discussion Starter #14
I know the feeling all too well. :( I thought this was just an American thing. I've gotten down to my goal weight, but have put it back on as well. It is always the same ones making comments about "you've put on weight" and/or "wow are you sick or something? Getting pretty skinny there." :confused: I think these people are just looking to make themselves feel good by trying to knock someone else down.

I have never in my life asked anyone if they were pregnant based on their looks. Besides just putting on weight, what if that person just miscarried or has a tumor (both of which I have seen)? We have the whole Freedom of Speech thing here, but that doesn't absolve you of being an idiot, a jerk, insensitive, or just plain stupid.
Ive had that about 5 times now. On another occasion I was helping at a preschool and a 4 year old girl innocently said "have you got a baby in your tummy?" . Now that didnt bother me, innocent remark from a child and I was quietly explaining no, some people are thin and some people are fat. The manager overheard and decided to bawl across a whole room of children and other mums, "Poppy....HOW DARE YOU! HOW RUDE! You never say has a lady got a baby in her tummy! You apologise to Mrs Bromley right this minute! you never say that ever!" The poor kid went absolutely scarlet, so did I as everyone else turned round and went silent. We were both sitting there trying not to cry. Poor little girl.

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I know the feeling all too well. :( I thought this was just an American thing. I've gotten down to my goal weight, but have put it back on as well. It is always the same ones making comments about "you've put on weight" and/or "wow are you sick or something? Getting pretty skinny there." :confused: I think these people are just looking to make themselves feel good by trying to knock someone else down.

I have never in my life asked anyone if they were pregnant based on their looks. Besides just putting on weight, what if that person just miscarried or has a tumor (both of which I have seen)? We have the whole Freedom of Speech thing here, but that doesn't absolve you of being an idiot, a jerk, insensitive, or just plain stupid.
Isnt it annoying? I thought I had it cracked when I got to my goal weight. Was NEVER going back there again. My problem was they changed the diet. I had been 18 months teaching myself not to snack and pick. I dont eat big meals but I can snack all day. They then changed the system and gave 49 extra points a week to allow for treats and snacking. TOTALLY threw me. Even though you didnt have to have them just knowing they were there just completely set me back. I just went to pieces as Id been so strict for so long. Stopped going to the meetings and the weight just started to go back on

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I find that if treated that way.... I can say "are you this Rude to everyone, or is this my lucky day"...... makes them think and realize just how inconsiderate they are....

my motto.... "Noone can take advantage of you, unless you LET them" ... and that includes talking rude to me

forget them... they aren't worth your time...and for whats it worth, I would have dropped that bracelet/necklace/whatever and had my words... and left the store...


BTW, I am on Jenny Craig... and have not told anyone other than my son & family.... just don't want the comments from everyone...


.
I thought about dropping the bracelet and walking out but I reeeeeeally wanted it. Lol

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Glad you don't work for that person anymore. You would think that women wouldn't be like that towards other women. It sounds like she was jealous and insecure of herself. I was called some of the same names in school! Lol. Mostly by girls too! I had a really tough upbringing, and I've never had much luck with keeping girlfriends around. We are too opinionated lol. Need to be more like guys and not sweat the small stuff lol
Yeah I'm glad to be out of there. She always talked about how unhappy she was with her weight. She definitely had issues with her appearance and sadly took it out on others. I know what you mean, some women can be so horrible to one another. I had a similar experience when growing up... In the last few years I've been making friends with women more, but in my 20s I almost only had male friends. lol

Would you believe she was the manager as well?
Sounds like youve had a tough time and Im sorry for that. I would never ever dream of ever saying anything to anyone about their appearance. Even when I was a child I knew it was wrong and hurtfull. Why do some people just not have that part of the brain that says keep your trap shut?
The other day one of the ladies I clean for asked if I wanted to borrow her Dawn French biography then followed that up with " lm only asking you if youd like to read it, Im not lending it to you because youre fat or anything". Why couldnt she just say "would you like to borrow this book?". I was going into the local shop abd said to a guy in the way "excuse me please, can I just squeeze through?". He turns round and says, "I shouldnt think you could squeeze through anywhere". Tbat was a total stranger. Why? Im quite an inofensive person. I dont understand it. I can never think of anything to say back quick enough, on that occasion I just went home and cried. Another time another lady I cleaned for asked me what xi was doing for the rest of the day. I told her I was going into town to have lunch with my husband. She actually said to me...." I do hope you are going to sit down and eat properly and not walk around eating like those other fat disgusting people". Again, what does Ruth do? Went home and cried, never said a word.
Omg... it's unbelievable how disrespectful some people can be! I get so annoyed with people like that. I don't know how they turn out like this, but unfortunately they seem to be everywhere. I agree, I think several parts of their brain are missing. lol
 

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Yeah I'm glad to be out of there. She always talked about how unhappy she was with her weight. She definitely had issues with her appearance and sadly took it out on others. I know what you mean, some women can be so horrible to one another. I had a similar experience when growing up... In the last few years I've been making friends with women more, but in my 20s I almost only had male friends. lol







Omg... it's unbelievable how disrespectful some people can be! I get so annoyed with people like that. I don't know how they turn out like this, but unfortunately they seem to be everywhere. I agree, I think several parts of their brain are missing. lol

Haha you sound like me. Some of my closest friends are guys, I can't keep a girlfriend to save my life! I have a couple girlfriends that I've gotten a bit closer to. And I do find it a little easier in my 30's to make female friends. But like you....in my twenties, and teens impossible! I'm glad you are out of your old work place, and hopefully in a happier less stressful environment.


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Haha you sound like me. Some of my closest friends are guys, I can't keep a girlfriend to save my life! I have a couple girlfriends that I've gotten a bit closer to. And I do find it a little easier in my 30's to make female friends. But like you....in my twenties, and teens impossible! I'm glad you are out of your old work place, and hopefully in a happier less stressful environment.
We do sound similar. hehe I think maybe we've been unlucky in the past. I've slowly come to realise that most women are fine and that maybe I was just unlucky to be surrounded by horrible ones when I was younger... and never gave them enough of a chance after. lol By the time I was in my 20s I didn't really know how to act around other women so I never really made friends with them. And maybe we were just lucky to make friends with decent guys (I know some men who are as bad as drama queens and as gossipy lol).
 

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oh man! im so sorry u went through that...i would've kicked that lady's butt lol! yes losin weight and keepin it off is real hard! i'm tryin my best to lose more weight and keep it off and have been goin thru a juicing and smoothie stage right now...lol! :lol:
 
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