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DOG PROPERTY LAWS
1. If I like it, it's mine.
2. If it's in my mouth, it's mine.
3. If I can take it from you, it's mine.
4. If I had it a little while ago, it's mine.
5. If it's mine, it must never appear to be yours in any way.
6. If I'm chewing something up, all the pieces are mine.
7. If it just looks like mine, it's mine.
8. If I saw it first, it's mine.
9. If you are playing with something and you put it down, it automatically becomes mine.
10. If it's broken, it's yours.


LIFE LESSONS LEARNED FROM A DOG:
1.If you stare at someone long enough, eventually you'll get what you want.
2. Be direct with people; let them know exactly how you feel by piddling on their shoes.
3. Be aware of when to hold your tongue, and when to use it.
4. Leave room in your schedule for a good nap.
5. Always give people a friendly greeting. A cold nose in the crotch is most effective.
6. When you do something wrong, always take responsibility.
7. If it's not wet and sloppy, it's not a real kiss.
 
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